John Cheese
Screen Shot 2015-05-03 at 5.32.33 PM
John Cheese as he is portrayed in the film
Vital statistics
Position Chosen by Soy Sauce
Age 25
Status Alive
Physical attributes
Height Unknown
Weight Unknown
John "Cheese" is the secondary protagonist of JDatE and TBIFOS, and the best friend of David Wong.

Appearance Edit

John's most notable feature is his long blond hair, which is sometimes tied back in a ponytail. John's facial features and build are not described in depth, but it is known that he is a little over six feet tall. 

In the film, John is portrayed with short dark blond hair and a muscular body. 


John tries to live his life as big and loud as possible, leading to his near-constant exaggeration of nearly everything for dramatic effect. John likes to over-play his sexuality, ego, and is known for taking almost nothing seriously. He is also well known for his ability to crack stupid and immature jokes during nearly any situation. In spite of his idiosyncrasies, John can be surprisingly moral and upstanding. He often uses his dumb humor to lift spirits, make scary experiences bearable, and cheer up Dave during difficult times. John is also an established troublemaker and his wild personality leads him to constantly act out in dangerously reckless behavior.  


John's history is not explored in depth, but it is known that John came from an unstable home environment and "got hit a lot as a kid". As a teenager, John was described as being friendly, loud, and always looking for adventure. He met David at age 15 in a computer class at school (which he was quickly expelled from for disruptive behavior). The two became best friends and continued to do so for ten years, despite his character being the polar opposite of Dave's. Despite his inflated ego, selfish attitude, and offensive sense of humor, John always puts other people before his own well being. He constantly monitors Dave's mood and behavior to make sure he isn't getting depressed. When Dave does get depressed, John does everything in his power to cheer him up and distract him from his bad mood. He does this the entire ten years he knows Dave.

In his late teen years/early twenties, John created a band called Three Arm Sally, despite knowing basically nothing about music. His songs had no rhythm or sensible lyrics, but he maintains the band all the way through the series. The events of JDatE begin after one of Three Arm Sally's gigs, when John takes the Soy Sauce (not knowing what it is) to prove he's more hardcore than everyone else present. John then becomes seriously sick and almost permanently dies from the Soy Sauce, and it is revealed he has a history of accidentally overdosing or becoming seriously ill from taking mysterious drugs.

As the plot furthers, John becomes more and more enticed with the concept of supernatural phenomenon. His adventurous personality draws him toward the unknown, and John doesn't seem to care that involving himself with the paranormal can be life-threatening. After the events of the first third of JDatE, John labels himself an expert in the paranormal and creates a blog describing his experiences. Dave, on the other hand, wanted nothing to do with the paranormal and the two become estranged for a short period of time. However, they reunite after several months of being apart and become best friends once more. John is able to convince the reluctant Dave to join him in investigating the otherworldly.

In TBIFOS, several chapters are dedicated to John's point of view and we see his issues with alcoholism. John had been drinking alcohol since his preteen years and is sometimes dependent on it. When he became separated from Dave and spent several days not knowing whether Dave was alive or dead, he essentially lost motivation to do anything. His desire to stop the spread of the parasitic spiders was tarnished, and he instead spent all his time getting drunk in random locations. We also see his attachment to Dave, as he became angered with Amy for thinking she loved Dave more than he did. John described his separation from David something Amy "couldn't even conceive". During the events of TBIFOS, John risks his life for Dave's physical and emotional well-being multiple times before considering any other alternative options (part of this, of course, is attributed to his adventurous and reckless way of living).